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Episode 132
'Episode 132 '''is an episode of the Drunken Peasants. It features the first appearance of the Liberal Viewer. Prev: Episode 131 Next: Episode 133 Highlights * A guest appearance from the Liberal Viewer * More news stories about scumbag cops acting like a bunch of violent barbaric animals Start of The Show The episode starts with a new shill intro in which a mysterious unknown member of the peasants coughs over it. Truly we are dealing with high value content. Scotty is once again replaced by Scotty Cena (who is far superior) due to being enslaved. TJ and the Liberal Viewer, who looks like Gabe Newell got off his Steam money mountain to take a jog, discussed the purpose of the media in a segment slightly more riveting than a reading of Noam Chomsky's ''Manufacturing Consent by the boring guy from the Dry Itchy Eyes commercials. The peasants watched a CNN news story about the Chattanooga shooting. How fun! The shooting resulted in the deaths of four Marines and three other individuals wounded. It is being investigated as a possible terrorist attack due to the assailant's Arab background. Then, the peasants covered some news about Donald Trump's insane poll results within the Republican Party, most likely as a result of his racism. Somehow this tactic works in spite of him being a lying sack of sleazy corporate scum. There's also apparently been some Twitter shit-slinging between the GOP candidates. Rick Perry also called out Trump for being an extremist. Oh the irony! Next, Gail Chord Schuler gave a heartfelt obituary and tribute to Satoru Iwata, the recently passed CEO of Nintendo. According to her, Mr. Iwata passed away from laughing to death after reading a job application. He laughed specifically because the applicant was so beneath company standards. She has decided to start a "Nintendo College" of sorts to teach computer programming, mathematics, and physics in his honor. She said it will be taught specifically for people attempting to enter the gaming industry as a program. Submit those applications now! When they became bored of Gail's video, they read an article about an app used to film sexual consent to confirm that both parties consented. They concluded it was all around irrelevant and lame. The peasants also added that if this app was in action, it will inevitably kill the mood for some sexual partners that are prepared to engage in intercourse. Their second article was about a lawsuit against some retarded police officers for stunning a teenage girl with a taser while she was suffering a seizure at a concert. Just another good cop doing his job to subdue the city's criminal element. Then, Barack Obama began stating why he pardoned a load of shiftless, evil criminal druggies. Obama's speech was interrupted by the official right-wing division of the "I'm offended" squad voicing their concerns over a Slave Leia Star Wars action figure. Little do they know about the Jabba The Hutt tit licker action figure as proposed by TJ Kirk. Middle of The Show The next thing the peasants covered was a news report by Fox News where multiple GOP candidates proceeded to voice their opinions on Donald Trump's candidacy. Most of them basically wanted the reporters to fuck off and cover their own campaigns for the sake of their egotism. One of the Fox News pundits covering it possessed the glorious and rare 70's porn and pedo-stache hybrid. May he ascend to the highest echelons of the face bush eminence! By the middle of the show, it would appear the KKK are depressed and in mourning over the loss of the Confederate flag on state capital grounds. They KKK have bravely decided to go forward with their rally in their area in spite of such a devastating loss. A random KKK lady has vouched that she would in fact help a darkie if they was broken down on the roadside. She does not however support Dylan Roof's slaughter of nine black church goers. However, if them darkies are done selling the dope in the back allies of that there hood, then she would've been in full support of Dylan fulfilling his duty as a good, clean whitey and massacring them evil, dope dealer darkies. The nightly police brutality quota hadn't been filled for the night, so the Peasants covered a news story about an asshole police officer named Douglas Rose breaking into the home of some random lady in Arizona and sexually harassing her then lecturing her to demand that she submit to his fascism. Unsurprisingly he had absolutely no legal or procedural reason for entering the home. He also received a paid vacation afterwards and swiftly retired from the force in the midst of the internal investigation. What a complete and utter coincidence. For an overdose of oppression of people's rights, they proceeded to watch a video about feminists trying to get some old dude arrested for disagreeing with them on Twitter. Thus proving yet again that Canada is the scourge of the world. To play around with the retard-o-meter, they watched a video by Joshua Feuerstein combating the evils of trannies, Satan, and Caitlyn Jenner. It would appear that deer and humans are highly comparable on a cognitive level, so therefore a buck can identify themselves as a doe. Plus, Gawd hates them and sin. End of story. End of The Show To experiment further with the retard-o-meter, the Peasants responded to another video from Prager "University", this time about how 'dem liberals have done plotted out treacherous economic pitfalls for good ole 'Murica ever since Social Security started up. The final and maximum stone to drop on the scales of the retard-o-meter was a video of Ken Ham, where he elaborates on how 9/11 was catalyzed by the sins of man. The solution was of course praying for atheists and all the other scum of the Earth. America is "under the judgment of God" according Ken, and we shall see more of God's wrath because of the recent legalization of homosexual marriage. By the way, in order to truly repent, you must join Ken's congregation for a nominal fee of $200.00 USD. But, because Scoopy is an anal splinter, they decided to let to him languor in the parking lot a little longer by playing some generic feminist dogma. The peasants agreed with a few things the feminist said. After running through the same fifty shades of feminist propaganda, they figured it was high they ended this fucking show. Plus Scoopler, although an anal splinter, would've entered the house in full Nazi regalia with his SS officers to drag TJ out if they went on any longer. Quotes * "I wish I could of been a Hitler Youth." - TJ Kirkeistein embracing his Aryan status; white, tall, blonde hair, blue eyes, and fat * "First they see the titties, then they commit the homicides." - TJ * "I just want America to be weak." - Ben exposing his communist thinking once more Trivia * TJ shot Dylan Roof's famous Confederate flag photos. * TJ is a committed non-voter. * Canada (you know, the hive mind Canada) hates free speech, as well as free expression. * The founder of Prager University is a filthy Joo. Disclaimer Offended? -> Disclaimer Page Category:Drunken Peasants Episodes Category:Episodes featuring Guests